BATH BOMB #37

THE BATH BOMB

@nti-copyright: copy and distribute!
Issue #37
free/donation
March 2011

"It's not big and it's not society"

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Not A Clegg To Stand On

CUTS ARE continuing as councils decide what they think ordinary people no longer need. Youth clubs, day care centres and swimming pools are the latest victims. Thousands of public sector jobs – and private sector ones.

In Bath on Saturday 5th February, around 60 protesters, led by the Bath Trades Council banner, marched energetically around the city. The march was to raise public awareness about the cuts and the likely sell-off of Bath's MoD sites (2,000+ jobs), and to show people they are not alone. It entered the Southgate Centre, a privatised mecca to consumerism, and briefly wrenched the area away from the expensive designer shops, opening it up as a space to share and celebrate progressive ideas. Top(sweat)Shop and V***fone booted out their customers and shut their doors. Maybe they felt guilty about not paying their taxes, with TopShop's profits being paid into the account of owner Phillip Green's wife, who lives in a Monaco tax haven. The march finished up at Queen Square where local students, trade unionists and activists had a go on the megaphone.

The following week, on the evening of Friday 11th February, Nick Clegg showed his face at the Guildhall, to field a Q.&A. and hopefully explain why he was betraying all his principles and voters. Despite an attempt by senior police – and an especially aggressive sergeant – to see it off, a noisy 70-strong demonstration greeted the Clegg when he arrived. He didn't seem best pleased to face his unhappy employers – the ordinary people on the street. Things didn't get easier for him either when he made it inside, where he faced another hostile audience. Apparently in revenge for people standing up for themselves, police made one arrest that evening, under Sections 5 & 6 of the Public Order Act. Allegedly, the arrestee caused alarm alarm, harassment and distress to politicians and police. But it seems no one will be arresting the government any time soon, for the distress they have doled out to millions through their cuts and job losses. Or will they?

The public meeting on Tuesday 15th saw unionites and pensioners speak of the need to build campaigns, and prepare for the coming demos in Swindon on the 5th March and in London on March the 26th, where the T.U.C. will finally join the struggle.

On Saturday 19th, around 700-800 marched in Bristol from Castle Green to the Council House. Unlike at the previous demo some months before, the police were better behaved this time around. Our embedded reporter reported with witty réportage regarding the new 'Bristol I.W.W. Little Songbook' – featuring such family favourites as 'I wanna mug a millionaire', 'Fight like an Egyptian' and 'George Osborne, you're so shit' (to the tune of 'Hey Mickey'). Just add singing lessons! After this, 40-odd anarchists went on to Cabot Circus, were they stopped off to occupy and close down down every offending bank and tax-dodger in the area, for the next two hours. One arrest eventually led to a further six at the solidarity demo outside Trinity Road copshop. Then on the Tuesday, a sub-prime demo of 30-40 gathered to make their feelings clear on Bristol City Council's setting of the budget, with the many angry speeches and heckling disrupting the pomp and circumstance, and prompting the elite to show their true colours, and ban public scrutiny; cops got to add one more Public Order arrest to their scoreboard.

Whilst the bite of the cuts in Bath is presently looking more like a friendly nibble compared to neighbouring areas, B.&N.E.S. are laying the ground-work. The local press reports that Council hardliners are plotting to increase volunteer labour in Bath libraries. But don't be paranoid, it's not like they're looking to replace existing paying jobs with unpaid ones, or anything...

We always need more cannon fodder to join Bath Anti-Cuts Alliance, so if you're feeling game, drop us a line on bathagainstcuts[at]yahoo.co.uk.

http://www.falseeconomy.org.uk

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To The Mubarakades!

AFTER 18 days of solid resistance, the unimaginable has happened, and the Egyptian people have overthrown the oppressive 30 year rule of Hosni Mubarak. 'Appy Daze indeed! Born of a string of powerful uprisings against dicatorial autocracies in the Middle East and North Africa, events in Egypt have spread to Algeria, Bahrain, Iran, Jordan, Libya and Yemen. For the people of the Middle East, these events will usher in a new era of democracy, human rights and freedom. Following on from the Tunisian example – a successful revolution sparked by the self-immolation of a young fruit vendor in protest at poverty and unemployment – the Egyptian people took to the streets in their millions. It is inspiring to see that neighbourhood committees have sprung up to democratically manage the running of local areas, peoples' delegations are taking on responsibilty for food distribution, traffic management, self defence and so on. As one young female protestor said, "We are doing all of this for ourselves – why do we need a government anymore?" The task now facing the Egyptian people is ensuring their revolution does not get hijacked by a corrupt military, the shadowy figures behind the Muslim Brotherhood or western economic interests. Cameron and Clegg take note: today it's Cairo – when will it be London's turn? The task, while we are waiting, will be to ensure that Mubarak doesn't squirrel away the possible $70 billion he's stolen from the Egyptian people, which would make him making him the world's richest man.

Update: Gaddafi is attempting to preserve his 41-year power trip in Libya, by shutting down international communications, and slaughtering at least 300 with fighter jets and machine guns. Some military high command and diplomats have defected. The 68-year-old tyrant has requested his own death as “a martyr”. East Libya has largely escaped his clutches, including the city of Benghazi, which declared itself victoriously independent; this means (civil) war.

https://secure.avaaz.org/en/mubaraks_fortune_l/?vl

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2011/02/12/AR2011021203767.html

http://abcnews.go.com/Business/egypt-mubarak-family-accumulated-wealth-days-military/story?id=12821073

http://www.aljazeerah.info/Opinion%20Editorials/2011/February/15%20o/Seize%20Money%20Stolen%20by%20Mubarak%20and%20Return%20it%20to%20Egypt%20By%20Paul%20Dunk.htm

http://www.nasdaq.com/aspx/stock-market-news-story.aspx?storyid=201102151027dowjonesdjonline000253&title=ecofineu-yet-to-agree-action-on-egypt-asset-requests

http://www.unodc.org/unodc/en/treaties/CAC/convention-highlights.html#Asset_recovery

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Cor! Strategy?

FITTING THAT B.&N.E.S. chose the Octagon in Bath's Milsom St as the venue for its propaganda exhibition 'Transform and Treasure', its so-called 'vision' for the city, covering the next 20 years: the fact that they actively encouraged a developer in 2008 to smash up this 1737 architectural gem so they could get some Cockney wideboy's restaurant inside, shows that they don't give a fuck for Bath's heritage, particularly when there is a row of £ signs on the horizon.

When the Octagon was being done over, someone nicked off with the £1 million chandelier suspended from the dome, and it hasn't been seen since. 'Transform and Treasure'? What a heap of shite! 'Trash and Trample', more like.

The 24-page glossy handout which accompanied the dereliction (sorry, 'exhibition') could and should have been condensed to a single sheet of A4. When the spin-doctors ran out of waffle, they junked in lots of pretty, infant-level colour pics to fill the blank spaces. Said the council's head of corporate-speak Mr J. Argon, 'We might not be able to spel, but we know synergy when we see it'.

Council whitewash-salesmen allege on page 12 that “The Council has a huge bank of experience of delivering major capital projects on time and within budget...” They conveniently forget the disastrous Spa, years late and £millions OVER budget, which will bankrupt the city for generations to come.

Virtually the only fact to emerge from the reams and reams of bullshit penned by consultants Bluff and Bluster in this charade of a 'public consultation' (translates as 'foregone conclusion') concerns the intention of B.&N.E.S. to waste yet more taxpayer's cash bailing out Bath Rugby. What next – using council tax reserves to financially prop up Sally Lunn's, 'Appy Daze, or any private business in the city?

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Wall Street Crash

IN A surprise piece of good news, the Bath Bomb has just learned that three high ranking investment bankers have finally made a decision to do the right thing – die! The chief executive of private equity firm MerchantBridge, and two high-ups in odious investment bank J.P.Morgan died when their private plane dropped out of the sky above Iraq. God knows what our recently departed friends were doing in Iraq, but many financial outfits are being lured to Iraq by the riches promised from a new U.S. dominated economy designed to rip the wealth out of the hands of Iraqi people and straight into the pockets of western companies. Among J.P.Morgan's proud list of achievements are the underpaying and pocketing of mortgage funds for Iraq war veterans, the financial underwriting of sleaze-ridden company Enron and investment in military and climate change-causing technologies. So, all in all, a good day's work for a faulty plane engine. R.I.P.?

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Bath Activist Network are a local umbrella group campaigning on issues as diverse as development, environmentalism, anti-war, animal rights, workers' rights and more. Helping to produce the Bath Bomb, we are open to anyone, and our members range from trade unionists to anarchists, liberals and greens, and people who just want to change Bath for the better. For details on meetings, demos, or just to get in touch, e-mail bathactivistnet[at]yahoo.co.uk, or see our website: http://www.bathactivistnetwork.blogspot.com

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Barf Litter Festival

SLASHED BUDGETS and council cutbacks have unfortunately failed to prevent this year's appearance in the city of the mental masturbation collective known as the Bath Literature Festival, or as the pseuds from the council office of A.R.S.E. (Abbreviations Revealing Spurious Ethics) would have it, the BathLitFest.

It's only because this leg of the nationwide literary circus tour is bankrolled predominantly by muggins Bath taxpayers, that the self-publicists which it largely contains, save a handful of notable exceptions, are able to pander to the wet dreams of the anally-retentive intelligentsia it is aimed at. Organisers have no principles; they'll even take money from the environment-destroyers at Bristol International Airport, who are listed as one of the sponsors in the festival brochure.

The plot of B.L.F. is formulaic and predictable. It caters purely for the wallet-bearing hips of the well-off, like it always has. The 'Hotels' section, this year on page 45 of the brochure, showcases, as usual, only the most expensive. The festival's narcissistic (whoops, 'artistic') director assures punters that 'This is YOUR festival'. Yeah, right, mate. Just so long as you're loaded, that is. How's an unemployed single mother from Twerton, say, gonna manage to afford to get to any event, given the derisory concession prices? Just a quid off full price admission is an insult, not a concession.

Bath Guildhall is a main venue, so any Bath punters coughing up for a gig here are doing so twice, once through their taxes to keep this place running, and secondly by paying to see whichever talking head is appearing. But do they get any discount? Do they buggery !

No marks for spotting a gratuitous plug for the moneyfest of the Olympics somewhere in the programme. You'd expect nothing less from the thinly disguised advertising agency called Bath Tourism Plus, as it steals from the poor yet again.

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UPCOMING EVENTS

drawing classes: 'Remembering the Present', Mondays & Tuesdays, Stokes Croft Museum, 81-83 Stokes Croft, Bristol, http://www.stokescroftmuseum.info

London Road Food Co-op, Wednesdays, 5-7p.m., Riverside Community Centre, London Road, telk 07837 784715, http://www.londonroadfoodcoop.blogspot.com

film: Factory Film Nights, Wednesdays, 7p.m., the Factory social centre, 26th Portland Square, Bristol, free entry; http://freefactory.wordpress.com

exhibition: 'Remembering the Present', Wednesdays, Thursdays & Fridays, 11a.m.-3p.m., Stokes Croft Museum, 81-83 Stokes Croft, Bristol, http://www.stokescroftmuseum.info

Bathampton Community Growers workday, Thursdays, 10a.m.-dusk, Mill Lane, Bathampton, e-mail thelostplot[at]googlemail.com/ tel Chris 07792 444628

Bathampton Community Supported Agriculture project: fruit picking, Thursdays and Sundays, 10a.m.-2p.m., FFI e-mail csa[at]transitionbath.org; www.bathamptoncsa.wordpress.com

Bath Stop The War Coalition vigil, Saturdays, 11.30a.m.-12.30, Bath Abbey Courtyard

Bradford-On-Avon peace vigil, Saturdays, 11.30a.m.-12.30, by the peace statue opposite Westbury Gardens by the Town Bridge, Bradford-On-Avon

exhibition: 'Remembering the Present', Saturdays, 12-4p.m., Stokes Croft Museum, 81-83 Stokes Croft, Bristol, http://www.stokescroftmuseum.info

Recycle Your Sundays, Sundays, 10.30a.m., starts Abbey Churchyard, the regular series of sociable, easy-paced cycle rides, http://www.bathrys.org.uk/ tel Hazel 01225 469199

Taunton anti-cuts protests, Sundays, 1p.m., Taunton centre memorial, http://www.tauntonac.wordpress.com

Queer Cafe all-day workshop & discussions, Friday 25th February, 12-7p.m., Manchester; e-mail bristolreading[at]racerevolt.org.uk F.F.I.

F.L.X.'s 24hr drawathon, raising money for Temwa, Saturday 26th to Sunday 27th February, 10a.m.,
King of Paint, 9a Haymarket Walk, Bristol, between bus station and the Bear Pit; http://www.temwa.org/support-us/upcoming-events/details....html

art installation: 'Resistance – Which Way the Future?', Sunday 27th February to Sunday 9th April, Brewhouse Theatre & Arts Centre, Coal Orchard, Taunton; running alongside the installation, Liz Crow will give an historical talk about the Nazi programme of murder of disabled people, exploring its origins and setting it in the context of the larger holocaust. The talks will be at The Brewhouse on Friday 18th March, 7p.m., entry £4.00; http://www.roaring-girl.com/productions/resistance-on-tour

Bristol Rising Tide meeting, Monday 28th February, 7.30p.m., Kebele Community Co-op, Robertson Road, Easton, Bristol

Bath Socialist Forum: 'Understanding the Cuts', Monday 28th February, 8p.m., upstairs St. James Wine Vaults

Bath Anti-Cuts Alliance meeting, Tuesday 1st March, 8p.m., the Bell, Walcot Street

Bath Activist Network meeting, Thursday 3rd March, 7.30-9p.m., downstairs at the Hobgoblin, St James Parade, http://www.bathactivistnetwork.blogspot.com

Council Tenants' Conference, Saturday 5th March, 11a.m., Council House, Bristol

Swindon anti-cuts demo, Saturday March 5th, 12 midday, Wharf Green, Swindon; F.F.I. e-mail swindonagainstcuts[at]yahoo.co.uk

Bristol & District Anti-Cuts Alliance benefit gig, Saturday 5th March, 8p.m., Granary Barge, Mardyke Wharf, Hotwells; £5 entry – cheques payable to 'Bristol Campaigns', to Anne Lemon, 4 Maycliffe Park, Ashley Hill, Bristol; feat. Fab 208, and prize for best pirate costume!

Bristol Anarcha-Feminists practical skillshare day, Sunday 6th March, 12 midday, the Factory social centre, 26th Portland Square, Bristol, free entry; http://freefactory.wordpress.com

SPEAK Campaigns Info Evening, Monday 7th March, 7p.m., Smiling Chair, 40 Stokes Croft, Bristol; free hot drink and vegan cake!; http://www.bristolanimalrights.org.uk

Transition Bath in Action Group meeting, Tuesday 8th March, 7.30-9.30p.m., United Reform Church Halls, Bath; http://www.transitionbath.org/tbag-meeting

film & talk: 'Shooting the War', Tuesday 8th March, 7.30p.m., Pierian Centre, 27 Portland Square, St. Pauls, Bristol; free entry, but booking necessary: tel 0117 924 4512 or e-mail info[at]pieriancentre.com

public meeting: 'Arguments for Revolution', Wednesday 9th March, 7.30p.m., the Canteen, 80 Stokes Croft, Hamilton House, Bristol; http://www.swp.org.uk

Bath Green Drinks, Wednesday 9th March, 8p.m., the Rising Sun, Grove Street

talk: 'How can I turn my passion into a business that changes the world?', Friday 11th March, 2-5p.m., Main House 1.11, Newton Park, Bath; http://www.transitionbath.org/how-can-i-turn-my-passion-into-a-business-that-changes-the-world

workshops/discussions: 'Reclaim the Fields', Friday 11th March to Sunday 13th March, from 5p.m., Sipson; http://www.reclaimthefields.org

Bristol and District Anti-Cuts Alliance, North Bristol Group: debate with Tory M.P. Charlotte Leslie, Friday 11th March, 7.30p.m., Horfield United Reformed Church, Muller Road

course: 'Transition Training', Saturday 12th to Sunday 13th March, 10-5p.m., St. Werburghs Community Centre, Horley Road, Bristol; £100 cost; e-mail shiftbristol[at]yahoo.co.uk

Bath FreeShop, Saturday 12th March, 12-3p.m., outside the Pump Rooms, Stall Street

Bath Animal Action & Bath Hunt Saboteurs meeting, Monday 14th March, 8-9p.m., The Bell, Walcot Street, e-mail bathanimalaction[at]yahoo.co.uk; http://www.bathanimalaction.blogspot.com

course: 'An Introduction to Permaculture', Tuesday 15th March and following three Tuesdays, 7-9.45p.m., St. Werburghs Community Centre, Horley Road, Bristol; £40-65 cost; e-mail shiftbristol[at]yahoo.co.uk

Bath Anti-Cuts Alliance meeting, Tuesday 1st March, 8p.m., the Bell, Walcot Street

Taunton Vegan Fayre benefit punk gig, Thursday 17th March, 7p.m., Winchester Arms, Taunton; £3 entry; feat. The Liabilities, Mouth, Bare Bones and Jake Van Perlo; http://www.tauntonveg.moonfruit.com

The Retreat Animal Rescue benefit punk gig, Saturday 19th March, The Plough, 223 Easton Road, Easton, Bristol; feat. Eastfield – more details T.B.C.; http://www.bristolanimalrights.org.uk

South West Regional Animal Rights Coalition meeting, Sunday 20th March, Bristol; F.F.I. E-mail barc[at]hotmail.co.uk

Bath L.E.T.S. Money Launch, Monday 21st March, 12.30-1.30p.m., Chapel Arts Centre; e-mail info@bathlets.org.uk

Bristol Old People's Forum, Thursday 24th March, 10.30a.m., Council House, Bristol

national T.U.C. anti-cuts demo, Saturday 26th March, 11a.m., Embankment, London; http://falseeconomy.org.uk/themarch

Bath Hunt Saboteurs meeting, Monday 14th March, 8-9p.m., The Bell, Walcot Street, tel 07854 062336

World Day for Lab Animals protest, Saturday April 16th, Whitworth Park, Oxford Road, Manchester; coach leaves Bristol Temple Meads train station at 8a.m., £10 minimum donation; e-mail bristolcoachworldday[at]yahoo.co.uk to book; http://www.wdail.org

Bristol Anarchist Bookfair, Saturday 7th May, 10.30-6.30p.m., Hamilton House, 80 Stokes Croft, Bristol; http://www.bristolanarchistbookfair.org

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Biting The Bullets

* THERE WAS an ironic sense of relief when it seemed that the Tory axe had killed off the ridiculous Bath Transportation Package last year, but it seems to be making a comeback. Even though various experts have expressed despair at the environmental impact and colossal waste of up to £60 million, the sacrifice of the Bathampton Meadows A.O.N.B. and vital wildlife corridors along the so-called Bus 'Rapid' Transit route, big business and university bigwigs are now attempting to revive this undead monstrosity. Sigh – time to dust off the tripods* and treehuggers* again, it seems
* A Combe Down man was threatened by Border Agency thugs last month, after an eight year stay in the area. Mark Pieterse, father of one, suffered a serious brain haemorrhage last year, and needs regular access to U.K. medicine in order to survive. Despite the attack by nationalist extremists who refuse to acknowledge the inalienable right to freedom of movement, the whole local community has rallied around him, rapidly raising funds in excess of £1,200, to help him stay
* Though those bastardly villains at Tesco have connived themselves planning permission to open in Stokes Croft in Bristol, the local boycott campaign is now taking the council to court for their unfair handling of the case. Please get in touch if you have legal experience or contacts, and we'll pass you on
* The potential W4B biofuel plant in Avonmouth has recently been granted planning permission by Eric Pickles, the Secretary of State for Shitting on Communities and Putting Local Government in its Place. Petroleum-based fertilisers, greenhouse gases and rainforest destruction; after all, pollution builds character
* Homecare workers in Swindon are facing the privatization of their service, along with attacks on pay and conditions. A campaign has been set up to defend it and its users, from a system that experience has shown leaves people neglected and staff underpaid and undervalued. A 120-strong demo on Thursday 17th drove this point home. To sign the petition, log on to http://www.carers4swindon.co.uk
* On March 5th, campaigners in Swindon will be stepping out for another home-grown demo against the cuts, starting midday at Wharf Green, Swindon. Locals are calling for as many people from the surrounding areas as possible to attend the demo. For more info, e-mail swindonagainstcuts[at]yahoo.co.uk
* Campaigners fighing the Tory plan to privatise half of England's woodland have won a temporary victory, as mass opposition has forced the government to abandon the crazy Public Bodies scheme which would have seen our ancient woodland flogged acre by acre to the highest bidder. While the notion has not yet been officially binned, it is, like the coalition itself, teetering on the brink, and just needs one good hard shove to send it slumping into the dustbin of history! The Bath Bomb sends fraternal solidarity to all the tree-folk who fought so hard against the lunatic plan
* In yet another turn-around for the coalition, six Labour-led councils have successfully sued the government over its scrapping of the School Building Programme. The scheme, set up to inject cash into crumbling comprehensive schools, was immediateley scrapped by the Tories, who instead favoured giving the money to 'free' and private schools. Mr Justice Holman described the policy as “illegal” and has ordered clueless Education Secretary Michael Gove to review the plans. A good day for ordinary pupils and teachers, a bad day for Gove, the Con-Dems and their pro-private school, anti-working class agenda
* Plans for the first potential U.S.-style 'super-dairy' cow factory farm, which would have been sited in Lincolnshire, was quelled in mid-February
* Ingenious net-activists have launched a website – http://www.sukey.org – aimed at avoiding oppressive police tactics such as kettling. The idea is simple – protestors text in information from the demo about police movements, which, once corroborated, is added to an interactive online map accessible through smartphones, which allow protesters to avoid the rozzers and keep active, effective, and on the streets. Yet another weapon in our activist arsenal! (now we just need a few guns... maybe...)
* Reclaim the Fields, a new “constellation” of “people” concerned with reassuming grassroots control of food production, have put a out a (pretentiously-worded) call out to “community food growers, farmers, permaculturalists, land occupiers, seeds savers and swappers”, to attend a weekend gathering on Saturday 12th March, at an community market garden project near Heathrow Airport. If you want to take part in the weekend's discussions, presentations, eating, music and all-round hootenanny, contact reclaimthefieldsuk[at]riseup.net, before the 6th March. Launching yourself into the unknown is optional
* But it's not all doom and gloom – if you're struggling to express your joy about the upcoming royal wedding of Whatshisface and Whosit, B.&.N.E.S. Council have just published a guide about how to organise a street party to celebrate. They've agreed to waive the charge for closing the road on April 29th, and enthuse “Street parties and fetes are a traditional part of British life; as with the Reclaim The Streets in the 1990s, 'Appy Daze like these are a fantastic way to get to know our neighbours, shake out the wood-smoke from our dreadlocks and fight Babylon. One love”. Honest, guv

* For an explanation of tripods, treehuggers and other wildlife-defending direct action measures, see http://www.uhc-collective.org.uk/webpages/toolbox/attack/blockading/tripods_lock.html

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-bristol-12439191

http://blogs.news.sky.com/boultonandco/Post:537787ac-7aeb-4fb3-8e58-025a28254511

http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/Politics/Government-Is-To-Abandon-Plans-To-Sell-Off-Englands-Public-Forests-Sky-Sources-Say/Article/201102315933326?lpos=Politics_Second_UK_News_Article_Teaser_Region_2&lid=ARTICLE_15933326_Government_Is_To_Abandon_Plans_To_Sell_Off_Englands_Public_Forests,_Sky_Sources_Say

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/forest-farce-cameron-to-axe-selloff-policy-2217131.html

http://www.bathnes.gov.uk

http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/food-and-drink/news/superdairy-plan-shelved-over-pollution-concerns-2217145.html

http://www.reclaimthefields.org

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L.E.T.S. Be Friends

INSPIRED BY Transition Initiatives in Totnes, Lewes, Stroud and Brixton, BathL.E.T.S. (Local Exchange Trading System) is printing paper notes, to represent its up-until-now virtual currency, the Oliver. The 80,000 Olivers' worth of new notes will give Bathonians extra flexibility in how they interact with their alternative economy, and they will be printed locally.

Only members with Oliver accounts will be able to transfer their electronic funds into greenbacks, although projects such as Community Supported Agricultural projects may be given dispensations to pay their staff upfront.

Olivers have never been tied to inflationary Sterling, so we avoid the dangers of being dragged down by the Titanic. The scheme's core group operates within an open, participatory and democratic framework, reserving the right to suggest the value. Olivers will not be available for purchase with Pounds Sterling, but are earned. It is not the aim of the scheme to make a profit, as the Oliver is backed by the products and services of its members.

BathL.E.T.S. has been going for 25 years, and has already teamed up with the local Time Bank Plus and Transition Bath. Next steps include persuading the council to accept Olivers for council tax, and links with the Credit Union would really herald a new dawn in local economics.

The big give-away is set for the 21st March, with a trolley and Blues Bros procession running from the Green Stationery Company at Walcot Street to the Chapel Arts Centre, to begin at 12.30. Attendants all get 15 Olivers each, for free! Spring Equinox, time of new beginnings! It's an exciting project, and if you want to get involved, let us know at info@bathlets.org.uk!

http://www.bathlets.org.uk

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Toadally Different

CUNNINGLY ENOUGH, B.&N.E.S. have picked 14th February as the start date for their six-week traffic-calming measures along Charlcombe Lane, aiming to coincide with the annual mass movement of the local frog, toad and newt population. The hillsides bordering the left of the lane are where they have been happily snoozing the winter away until it gets mild and wet enough for them to make the trek to Charlcombe lake where they will lay their eggs. The council insist on mistakenly calling their highway measures a 'road closure', pissing off many locals, some of whom dash off angry letters to the Comic complaining that they can no longer use this peaceful route to blast their 4x4s through, rat-run style. In fact the road is open all along its length, but physically narrowed by the presence of plastic barriers halfway across it at several points, which aim to slow traffic while still permitting access.

The odd motorist halfwit who lets rip down here regardless of the clear signage, is one reason why a small army of volunteers turn out at dusk in the full-on coupling season (frog, not human) in gumboots and high-vis kit, wielding torches and buckets, to scoop up as many as possible (toads and frogs, not motorists) and pop them over the high wall on the far side of the lane.

The public notices which appear on lamp-posts in the vicinity make it clear that “This order (i.e. traffic order) is required because of the likelihood of danger to the public consequent upon the annual migration of the local toad population from one side of the road to the other.. .”

So you can't say you haven't been warned; Mrs A. M. Fybyan, B.&N.E.S.'s wildlife spokesman, told the Bomb, “The sight of squashed human bodies, broken limbs, and the mangled and flattened wreckage of vehicles littering Charlcombe Lane at this time of year is not a pretty one, and shows only too graphically what happens when man fucks with nature and sticks a road in the wrong place. You can understand the little buggers turning really ugly. The single-minded determination of these sex-starved animals to get their leg over underwater will let nothing stand in their way. So if you see a toad crossing the road in Charlcombe Lane, unless you are wearing full body protection, or your car is armour-plated, my advice has to be – don't mess with it!”

http://www.toadsonroads

http://www.froglife.org

http://www.arc-trust.org

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(A)rms For The Poor

For three years, the Bath Bomb has been sniffing out scandal, unveiling council and big business sleaze, telling it like it is and isn't, and poking fun at the rich and powerful (something we unfortunately have no short supply of in Bath). We have done all of this on a budget of zero, save the odd kind donation and benefit gig (we asked the council for an arts grant, but haven't heard back). Now, we need your help to secure the future of the Bath Bomb, and here's three simple steps you can take to do it:

Become a 'Comrade of Bath Bomb' – for £15 waged/£10 unwaged, you will get a shiny new copy of your favourite scandal mag posted to your door each month for a year, along with a fashionable, limited edition Bath Bomb badge and 'Comrade of Bath Bomb' card, which gets you modest discounts on a growing number of local outlets – e-mail us F.F.I.

Sponsor an issue – each month, we run off 500 copies of the Bomb, and e-mail out to a further 93, costing £70 per month. Do you or your group love the 'Bomb enough to sponsor a whole issue? Sponsorship gets you a year of copies posted to your door, a badge, a 'Comrades' card, a certificate to show off on yer living room wall and maybe even your name on the front cover if you're feeling risqué

One-off donation – any one-off donation which covers cost gets you a Bath Bomb badge and this month's issue posted to your door

To donate, send cheques payable to 'B.A.A.', along with your name and address, to: Bath Bomb Press, P.O. Box 426, Bath, BA1 2ZD.

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And now, to the disclaimer: as anyone is free to contribute, the opinions expressed in each article are not necessarily reflective of all contributors. Naturally, any right-wing or corporate bullshit will be binned and spat upon. Needless to say, the opinions of the author of this disclaimer do not necessarily reflect the opinions of any other contributor.